'she doesn't know she's okay.'

Today during Playgroup, sweet baby Alder was having a hard time getting her body down for a rest.  (She turned one today, by the way.  That brown-eyed babe that is funny and smiley and so charming my heart grows a bit bigger is one year old today.)

Alder's big sister, Ella, said, "Wow, Alder's really crying."
We were sitting on the couch reading books.
I told Ella, "Yeah, Baby Alder doesn't know she's okay. She doesn't know she can just calm her body down and go to sleep."

I paused after I said this.

How often I don't know I'm okay.  And I can't calm my body down and breathe in the moments of my life, realizing I'm so divinely okay.

(Sweet Alder ended up sleeping, about thirty seconds after I said this.)
God is good.

oh, and a post script: thank you to Joyous JJ for calling to check in about the 'official change in status.'  thank you to Deborah in class for letting me cry on your shoulder about six times today. Thank you to Sweet Beth.  Your friendship is such a refreshing light in my life! (Georgia Byrd!) And, Darling Becky--thank you for tea and honesty (i almost wrote 'honest-tea' but i'm not that cheesy, am I?)  I am blessed with fabulous girlfriends.
God is soooo good.